Safe or 2nd base?

Last night was my first official encounter with the x-ray scanner at the airport. In all my travel last year, I somehow managed to avoid it. In San Diego, I told the agent that I did not want to go through the scanner. I was told to sit down in a chair while the man went to find an agent to pat me down. The female agent did not hide her annoyance. She was especially thrilled when I accepted the offer of a private room for the pat down. The articles in the news made the pat downs sound very invasive. I did not want people watching me being man-handled (well, woman-handled). So, the female agent had to find yet another female agent to witness the pat-down. The whole thing was awkward, but I suspect it was mostly awkward because the agent was so pissy about it.

No, I will not conform to a false-sense of security and go through an x-ray machine without a lead vest. Especially since I am given a lead vest at the dentist when the machine is only pointed toward my mouth. Although, I care more about the principle than the health risk.

I anticipated the pat-down to be analogous to 3rd base, but it was not that thorough.

In a private screening room, I stood on my soap box.

Love and faithfulness

This morning was pretty awesome; so awesome in fact, it set the course for my entire day. I love days like that. I was reviewing my prayer journal and found the page dedicated to myself. I reread two verses in a completely different way.

Proverbs 3: 3

Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.

I used to think that I had to be loving and faithful. That's tough. This morning I read it realizing that I need to wear God's love and faithfulness never leave me. I need to trust that God is loving and faithful, always. That He will persevere through the heartache, suffering, and tragedies. Thanks to Pastor Stephen's message on Sunday, I realized that I have difficulty trusting in God. So this morning, I wore a necklace to remind me to trust that God is always loving and faithful.

Philippians 3: 8

More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain in Christ.

Once again, I used to think I understood this verse. I read it in Haiti and thought I needed to rid myself of worldly possessions. That, obviously, did not work out very well. This morning, I read it and saw it as a way of prioritizing things in my life. I so often believe lies that define myself in worldly things (weight, job, appearance, etc.). Today, however, I count them as rubbish compared to Jesus Christ, my Lord. I have the freedom to confess to Jesus how I do define myself in those things and there are things that I do want. Combine that with love and faithfulness, and I trust that God will reveal the desires of my heart. I trust Him to do so, and today I think I experienced joy in waiting. An answered prayer!

Even if for a day, I am thankful to have been able to trust in God's love and faithfulness and consider all things rubbish compared to Jesus. Pray for me, as tomorrow is a new day!

A difficult thought.

At the whole gospel class this morning through my church, I heard the speaker, Dr. Gates, tell a story from a male friend in South Africa. In it, the man was with his girlfriend in high school. His girlfriend was shot by a police officer or some militant man. An officer had stood over them with his gun but left instead of shooting either of them. Dr. Gates commented on how his friend had described that officer as a "Christian brother." Either Dr. Gates or the friend described it as a "perverted Christianity."

This story sparked a thought. No matter how "bad" or "evil" we judge someone to be based upon his or her actions, we are all brothers and sisters. We all need a Savior.

Being "pretty good" is not enough. Jesus lived perfectly and is willing to share His perfect record with us. He does not hoard His Father's kingdom; He shares it with us. He wants us to enter His kingdom.

The harsh reality is that we all need a Savior; our system for defining bad actions is just that: ours.

Fuel for an SLP

Today was Friday; sometimes, I feel so tired by the end of the week that a Friday is more like a Monday. I did not want to get out of bed. I did not want to go to work. I enjoy working, so to not want to go is significant. Some days, I just want to curl up into a ball.

By the grace of God, I arrived to work on time. My morning appointment did not show. I was annoyed but glad to have time to accomplish other tasks.

My first group was two students who stutter. One is in third grade while the other is in second grade. One teacher reported that the student was participating more and using a strategy we had practiced the week before. The other student reported saying words she used to avoid. I was thrilled, so speech time became a time of celebration. The best part? They wanted to learn more, so they practiced math problems on the whiteboard. I was floating on air.

I also ran around my classroom with a group of kindergarten students playing zombies. It was really fun. It's also not unusual.

The second highlight of my day was exiting a student from special education services. He no longer needed speech therapy. It's just such a blessing to see the parent, the teacher, and myself supporting a student. It's also bittersweet to graduate students from speech. I'm so proud, but it means I no longer get to work with the student. He is such a good role model for pretend play; he has a convincing dragon impression.

As an added bonus, I practiced my Spanish today with a parent. We did fairly well communicating. Her daughter only translated for us a few times. I really just need to make up words, because half the time what I would have made up is actually correct.

I really am doing the job I was created to do.

Godly justice

Yesterday, after a long day at work, I drove through the alley behind my house to discover a car was parked in my space. I was confused. I pulled into my neighbor's empty space. I checked around to see if someone was visiting a neighbor, but no one else was home. My confusion turned to annoyance and frustration.

I decided to write a note with my phone number, since I parked behind the car. I wanted justice. I did not want a vicious confrontation, but this person needed to realize that her actions affected someone else.

Waiting for the phone call was tense. Finally, the phone rang with the awkward plea for me to move my car. She intended a quick trip that lasted longer than anticipated. I said next time...pause...well, you have my number so just call me to let me know. I moved my car; she moved hers and then waited for me to park. She was relieved that I offered my spot, if I wasn't home. Her name is Christine. She may call today or Tuesday if I'm not home to use my parking space.

Only God could have orchestrated justice and redemption in the same day.

Brace-less!

On 3/3/11, I wrote the following description and challenge regarding Exodus 11: 1.

"While Moses was asking for a 3-day excursion to the desert to worship the Lord, God planned for the liberation of the Israelites. God knew their deepest desires; He had seen their suffering and heard their cries. He provided for the root of their needs.

...

How will you be bold today? Let’s ask God for something we’d typically explain away as impossible. Write down the request and wait. Keep it somewhere safe, because blessed are those who wait upon the Lord (Isaiah 30: 18)."

That day, I wrote a list of 8 things. One was something I wanted immediate results; the rest were more long-term desires.

At the top of my list was "an appointment today with the specialist and/or taking care of the next step with 1 appointment." When I called to make an appointment, the soonest available was 5 days later. I was disappointed, but I put my trust in God to come through on the second half of my prayer request.

Today I sat in the waiting room, nervously. I told God that I was scared. I trusted Him to heal my wrist, but I also acknowledged that it may not look like how I want it to look like. I assumed the specialist would put my arm in a plaster cast. I began to ponder how quickly he could put my arm in a cast.

God acted upon my request in a way that I did not anticipate. The specialist looked at my x-ray reports and accessed the films on the digital database. He told me that my type of injury would not appear as healed for potentially 5 months or more. This does not mean it hasn't healed. He moved my hand and wrist around. It didn't hurt. The muscles were stiff when he rotated. He told me that I had to wean myself off the brace. I didn't have to put it on again. He told me that I could begin using it again but not to do anything vigorous until 4 weeks. I can type; I can jog; I can clap; I can drive with 2 hands! I will anticipate my return to Bollywood in 4 weeks!

He told me to schedule an appointment in 6 weeks; if I felt like my wrist was fine, then I could cancel it. He anticipates I will cancel it, thus only requiring one appointment to take care of the next step.

I was awed by God's tenderness and response to my request. I felt like Moses; I only asked for 3 days of release, but God liberated me completely. Praise God as He continues to heal my wrist and be with me as the muscles loosen up.

In case you're wondering, the first thing I did with BOTH of my hands was clap.

I will sing your praises, Lord! He healed me. :)

not alone

I'm so thankful for the body of Christ. I'm not alone. Support comes from many people. I'm learning to receive help from others. It's pretty cool! I have such incredible friends! Now i'm hoping God will heal my wrist, unless there's more for me to learn!

It's also been a blessing to contact some of the people from my 2nd Haiti team. Fun to reminisce, encourage each other, and remember that we aren't alone.

Community is such a blessing.